By: Lynette Davidson

Throughout my parenting years I’ve tried to go against my nature of being direct and to the point and find ways to correct and discipline my children by focusing on the positive (what I want my son and daughter to do vs. the thing they are currently doing).

One of my most helpful tricks is to come up with catch phrases and reminders and put them up around our home.

Phrases like:

     “Find every opportunity to encourage each other.”

     “Instant and Complete Obedience.”

     “Love God, Love People.”

     “Love, Kindness, Respect.”

      “I choose joy.”

I also love putting up scripture verses on a dry erase board on the side of the refrigerator that go along with a theme for the month (goals, attitudes, or a love verse for Valentine’s).

However, sometimes it is difficult to remember a well-worded phrase when you’re in the thick of a bad attitude, or chaotic situation that just won’t change!

One day in particular, I had just about had enough.  The constant bickering, the critical words and the uncontrollable stream of tears … all of it. My sweet daughter was having a bad day. So I jumped into action and plastered Ecclesiastes 7:9 “Control your temper, for anger labels you a fool,” all over the marker board! RIGHT!! Surely my kids don’t want to be fools. Even in the moment of uncontrollable, unexplainable hormone mood swings, surely the fear of being labeled a fool would redirect their efforts and they’d decide to “Choose Joy.”

That very morning the Spring 2014 issue of  “For Girls Like You” magazine came in the mail. And there on the front cover “Speak Love” popped out at me! YES! Perfect timing, this is exactly what my daughter needs to read!

Before giving it to her I flipped to the article featuring Annie Downs and her new book and read the question “What does it mean to speak love?” She answers, “To speak love means to choose words that will help someone, not hurt them. Speaking love is using the power you have in your words – just like it talks about in Proverbs 18:21 – to make someone feel loved.”

Do you ever have those moments when you realize God just gave you a talking to? 

I had not controlled my temper. I’d written that verse out of frustration, not out of love. I had been foolish.

I realized the words I’d written out on the marker board would not make her feel loved. 

So, I went and got the marker board and erased the verse.

I realized I needed to focus on reinforcing the attitude that I wanted – love and kindness. I want to treat and speak to my kids in a way that helps them grow, but in a way that reflects God’s love. {Tweet this!}

My daughter and I talked, I love using every day moments as an excuse to talk to her. After talking through my little lesson, I asked for her forgiveness, we hugged (I think hugs are the most powerful action) and said “I love you”.

Although Ecclesiastes 7:9 is truth, I want that marker board to be filled with words that make my kids feel loved and remind them of who they can be even if they are having a bad day.

Simply put, I want to Live a Life of Love!

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Lynette has a heart for her family and a love for Christ that calls you into action.  She is a wife and mother of 2 amazing kids, 10 year old Breanna and 8 year old Brant.