I am sitting at my dining room table facing my laptop. On my left side is my husband’s Mac with a screen of sound waves facing me ready to record; at least that’s what he said. In front of me is a pen and a few sheets of scribbled on paper. I place my iPhone on top of the Mac, while pressing record in the voice memo app (because I’m sure this will record) and I pick up my house phone and begin to dial…
Sounds crazy? Well I am sure it looked that way! If one had peeked into my living room window they would have thought I had serious technology addictions. Which I may, but that’s a blog for another day!
On this day I was getting ready to speak with bestselling author and founder of Secret Keeper Girl, Dannah Gresh! You see, God had laid it on my heart to invite moms to journey with me through Dannah’s recent book, Six Ways to Keep the “Little” in Your Girl and as an extra bonus HE made it possible for me to speak with the author herself! So, as a mom of four girls and founder of For Girls Like You Magazine, I did not want to miss a single word of wisdom that was going to flow from this woman’s mouth!
And since all of my devices worked…I get to share our conversation with you! But I must tell you, Dannah’s answers are so full I don’t believe you can take it all in at once! So today’s blog is devoted to part 1 of…more.
In your book, Six Ways to Keep the “Little” in Your Girl you say, “A Mom has to start opening up her 16-year-old’s heart…when she is seven! “ I love that! However, it leads me to ask “What if I am too late?” There are a lot of moms reading this who feel like they have missed the mark. “I have been doing it all wrong and now my 7-year-old is 11 and is totally emerged in pop-culture and the world’s value systems.” Is it too late? What can I do to reclaim my little girl?
Well, if it’s too late then we don’t have a Savior who we believe is big enough for every challenge. The bottom line is that we have to rely on God. When we have made decisions we regret or if we haven’t had the opportunity to influence them the way we would have liked, we have to rely on the Lord and bathe them in prayer. I understand this because I have two girls. They are both 17. They are two months apart. Lexi is my baby by birth and she and I enjoyed a really rich relationship during those counseling years (age 6-11) and I can feel that. She shares my values. She challenges them sometimes but she can process them and usually come to where I am. She is close to me. She feels close to me. I feel close to her.
Then there is Autumn. I didn’t adopt her until she was 14. So I’m having to go back and make up for all the tea parties that we never had. All the mother daughter dates we never did and all the copying and counseling that never happened. So there are days when I feel a little hopeless. I have to remind myself that my God is plenty big enough for Autumn. He is concerned for her more than I am concerned for her.
So what you do is take it day by day and you let the Spirit guide you day by day. Because we can over compensate sometimes. And we just have to say, “Holy Spirit what is she ready for now?” Whether she is an 8-year-old playing with the wrong kind of dolls or a 17-year-old that doesn’t share my value systems. We have to ask, “Holy Spirit what is she ready for today?”
Wow…. No matter how old your girl is, or how you may rate yourself on the parenting scale, how encouraging is it to know that it’s never too late? Our God is BIG. So Moms (and Dads), my prayer is that you give yourself a break on the “did nots and should haves” and trust God for His wisdom as you move forward in shepherding, disciplining and loving on your girls!!
Interesting in journeying through Six Ways to Keep the “Little” in Your Girl with other moms? It’s not too late to join us here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/forourgirls/